Thursday, December 24, 2009

Analyze This...

Monday, August 25, 2008

Life changing events...they happen every day. We dont recognize them at the time, but yet, they are everpresent. When you're me...you think. That is just what you do. I sit back...and look at everything- i analyze things to the point where the words run together...and it all starts to sound foreign. I dont know, im tired...and that doesnt help. Im a cynic...not by choice, but because i have had to be to survive. When all you see are thorns...all you have felt are thorns...are your eyes even able to adjust long enough to see a rose? Mistaken, i have been many times before- for someone who is just there...someone who just breathes. I think i understand...as sometimes my complexity even confuses me. I have never believed in whimsical tales of knights in shining armour...i have never believed i could look at another and see something that reflects myself. Believing is seeing...but is seeing believing? Can the truth yell at you...but you still don't hear a word? People dont believe in God...but He is still there. I have always said I didnt believe in love...or at least not in the way its depicted by some...alas, i find myself questioning all that i have ever thought. Then, i turn around...and ask myself...is this all a facade? Have I been bambooseled? Moreso...have I even fooled myself? Is it really possible for me of all people to find something where nothing stands? Is it really even feasible for me to think I am capable of any of this...? My conclusion....I need sleep...desperately.

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